Lost At Sea

I hate it when people have to rely on alcohol.

theredhotfoofighter:

Im going to get a drink

Whiskey and cutting, perfect bedtime treat.

when does it even count / not count as a relapse?

I started laughing and smiling when i cut myself…

i think i need to heck myself into somewhere soon

Time to write how i feel cause apparently its fucking good for me or some shit.

I really fucking hate everything right now and not in a ”oohh, something i didnt want too happened and now i hate everything ‘cause im a little bitch”  kind of way, every fucking day i just get more and more fucking angry and i get lower and lower into fucking darker thoughts, i have them all the fucking time and it doesnt even fucking scare me anymore, nothing scares me, i am afraid of nothing right now and thats not a fucking good thing. there is nothing keeping me in place or holding me back right now, there is nothing to stop me killing myself, there is nothing stopping me going on a rampage with a fucking axe i dont have anything at all right now and i dont fucking care about anything. i dont care about myself, i dont care about my health i dont care about my family i dont care about my friends and i dont care about life. im not gonna do anything because i dont care about it all but its fucking ‘good to write shit down’ apparently so here you fucking go, im wiriting, fuck lot of good its doing, just making me angrier.

Note: its happened enough time to be a thing now, when im angry, i twitch allot.

double dose sleeping pills should do the trick, if not who fucking knows

staying in bed unlit half an hour before my mum comes home…looks like iv been up all day..aww yeahh